Just because...

We have been so loved on lately. It continues even weeks later. While the grief has set in, I continue to be encouraged by sweet friends and family that have sent notes, flowers, gift cards for restaurants and just been there for us. I have tears in my eyes just typing this. Thank you! 

In the last few days I've had a few friends post their "good news" on FB. I should be excited for others and their expanding families but just couldn't bring myself to hit that like button. One friend is due in October and a family member is due in October. That was hard to read.  We were due Oct. 15. A sweet family member told me to picture our baby in Jesus' arms. That is so helpful. It just still hurts. I think October will be really hard. 

The girls have asked about the baby. It's not easy explaining to a three and two year old that your baby is with Jesus in Heaven. Jesus heals people. Why not just heal the baby? How do I even explain that. Why haven't I taught them more about God's good plan and that sometimes He chooses not to heal? Pray for us as we continue to explain that to them. They want another baby. How do I tell them that the baby is better off with Jesus yet SJ and C are better off with here with us. I know that's God's plan for them but I've struggled with the sense in it. Maybe I'm crazy. I don't know. 

What I do know is I'm thankful for all of you who read this blog. I'm thankful for those who have reached out. Whether you understand our hurt or don't and just love us. I'm so thankful.